The Daily Chao
At Tsarskoe Sela, I witnessed parents and grandparents encouraging small children to feed squirrels and pigeons from their hands on three separate occasions. Two instances were successful.
1. An animatronic executioner* stands guard outside the Medieval Torture Museum on the Peter and Paul Fortress grounds. Its head turns every 25 seconds or so.
2. The beach at the Neva River
*Exciting cultural exchange moment: I got to explain the word “animatronic” to the lovely Russian lesbian couple that showed us around yesterday. “In America, we have a restaurant chain called Chuck E’ Cheese where children have birthday parties. At Chuck E’ Cheese, they have a rock band with a mouse that is a machine like that executioner…”
The Peter and Paul Fortress* houses this statue of Peter the Great, which is notable because while most statues of Piter are stately and commandeering (e.g., Piter riding a horse, Piter looking out over the city), this one depicts the city’s founder with a tiny head, broad body, and over-sized, spindly fingers. We waited in line to take this picture, watching children clamber into his lap and Russian women stretch seductively into his arms. Carpe diem, Russian ladies, carpe diem.
*Note: Although Peter and Paul fortress was designed to defend the city from invading Swedes, it was never used for any military purpose. Before it became a tourist attraction, it held political prisoners.
The State Hermitage is one of the largest and oldest art museums in the world, and it was the only thing I knew I had to see when I arrived in St. Petersburg (prepared for this trip I was not—everyone who had been to St. Petersburg told me I should go to this Hermitage place so I figured they were right). Evan, my host, had school all day yesterday, and the museum was basically the only thing I felt confident navigating on my own since the museum is accustomed to foreign visitors and therefore bound to have some English-language materials. The museum is also large enough to take up an entire day and easy to find since it is enormous. Low probability of getting lost in the streets of St. Petersburg and never finding my way home, I figured.
It occurred to me that I’ve never actually been to a museum that housed such a large and diverse collection in one place (I’ve only skimmed the Met, never been to The Louvre, and the Smithsonians split their collection between themed museums). I saw paintings of Russian courtesans, tea services and furniture collections from the various aristocracy, works from the Italian masters (Michelangelo, Raphael), rooms of Matisse and Picasso and Kandinsky and Monet, Mughal miniatures, Japanese samurai costumes, etc.
No doubt the collection was incredible, but also strangely curated and managed. The rooms in the “Oriental” wing alternated between Chinese*, Japanese, and Indian art. Louise Bourgeois’s headless, multi-boobed rubber dog statue was on a brushed stainless steel podium behind a bunch of 3rd Century, A.D. Roman busts in the antiquities section (i suspect the curators were obligated to display the work since it’s from a famous artist, but didn’t want to put it in a heavily-trafficked area. Their 20th-century collection includes very famous, universally renowned artists such as Picasso, and was probably too conspicuous a location. In fairness, Bourgeois’s piece was the only piece I saw from after 1950, so the 20th century wing wasn’t a perfect fit. Without a natural home, the only place left for the statue was obviously with the antiquities in the basement.)
It’s also worth noting that I’ve never been to a museum that allowed its staff to open the windows, especially when it was POURING outside. I’ve also never been to a museum that left swollen silicone packets in the glass display cases, or allowed direct sunlight to beat down upon its priceless work.
And if you’re wondering how I got to take photos inside the museum, the Hermitage allows visitors to take photos for a small fee (200 rubles, or a little less than $6.) I decided against paying, since I’ve never taken photos in museums; however, when I entered, there was a HUGE Chinese tour group snapping away in the entrance. Well, the museum staff probably thinks I’ll take lots of photos anyway, I thought. And so I did. Enjoy!
*Note: I tried to skip the Chinese section of the museum because I figured I’d seen the best of Chinese art from my many visits to The Palace Museum in Taipei. Boy was I glad I went! While the Palace Museum is all famous bronzes, porcelain wares, and calligraphy, The Hermitage’s Chinese art section features a lot of work from the Indo-Tibetan region, the likes of which I’d never seen in person! It’s an interesting study of what Chinese people think is interesting (Han Chinese culture) versus what non-Chinese people want to see (mystical stuff from “the Orient”).
in case you were wondering
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Allen:How's being vegetarian there?
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Daily Chao:awful
- i ate THE WORST THING today
- it was a bun with cheese in it
- but it had some kind of weird cream cheese or mayonnaise spread inside
- and pickles
- i almost threw up!
- i am going to nap. it's exhausting just thinking about that shit.
- Earlier that day I tried to order food on my own for the first time...
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Daily Chao:Do you speak English?
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Food Cart Girl:No. Only Russian.
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Cart Boy:Yes. What would you like?
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Daily Chao:I am a vegetarian. Do you have anything with no meat (makes "no" hand gesture)
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Cart Boy:We have hot dog. Is good?
An appropriate song to discover in a Russian gypsy cab.
White Night Approaches
It’s almost midnight in Saint Petersburg, Russia, and the sky is still blue—not the bright blue of morning but definitely not the dark cover of night. Milky twilight; I finally understand what Sixpence None the Richer was getting at.
It’s been a disorienting 32 hours. Yesterday, I woke up at 4:40 am to catch the first BART to the airport. I sat on a plane, then raced through JFK airport only to catch another one, a Paris-bound one, where I was stuck next to two drunk girls with major Trans-Atlantic flight anxiety and rhinestone-studded Eiffel Tower necklaces. Then another flight to Piter, where I am both thrilled to see my friend and bewildered by the foreign-ness of the experience.
While my friend was at work, I took a long stroll along Nevsky Prospekt, the main shopping drag of the city. The city is all arched windows and columns, girls with tall shoes and slender thighs, and the occasional restaurant, which I can identify because ресторан is the only Russia word I know. And because there are people eating outside.
This is just to say, I’ve arrived safely. I am confused but happy, excited for what’s to come. When I get too busy, I often forget how amazing the world around me is. The way I feel about St. Petersburg (so far, anyway) is the same way I feel about hiking through Mount Tamalpais or seeing the ocean or clambering up a hill to watch the sun rise over fields of tea; how is it possible that such an amazing place exists, and how is it possible not to think of it every single day?
-DC
Also, has anyone ever noticed that the interior of Charles De Gaulle looks both modern and outdated? Its design vision is somewhere between Virgin America Airlines and the Limited Too.
Also, is Parisian water potable? I’ve only traveled to one country where drinking tap water was advisable.
This. This is the best thing on the internet!
The U.S. city with the highest per-capita food spending is... Austin, TX? →
With its thriving music and food scene, the Texas capital is growing bigger each year. And despite its low cost of living, the average budget for food and drink is surprisingly large. Guest Eater Vicky checks in with several Austin foodies to learn more about eating out in “the live music capital of the world.”
I’ve crazy-busy lately, and here’s one of the things I’ve been doing in my time away from Tumblr. Make sure you check it out, and maybe take a peek at the sister post on Detroit, which has the lowest per-capita spending on food.
